{ Shadow Days }

 

 

There was a lot going on as we headed out of town on Ry’s motorcycle.

We were taking some time away as this was the weekend we were supposed to be getting married. And for a lot of reasons, we didn’t … even though we wanted to be.

And he had already given the time off to his staff. And he had the time off – the first block he has taken in many years – and so we embraced it. Planned a trip.

Packed what we needed into two tiny bags that sat on the back of the bike.

I bought my first helmet.

And we left town.

I knew that my biological father was dying.

I knew that there would be family to see and a service to attend.

But we left anyway. Knowing that we had a couple of days to just BE.

And we made the most of it – leaving absolutely everything else behind.

We started off in Buffalo, where we stayed at an old historic hotel and ate the best breakfast the next morning. The steps behind me in this picture are hard to see, but the rise (or tread?!) have different shapes punched out. Could have had a great little photo shoot there, had I brought my camera.

I have no idea how to be a biker chic, but I’m doing my best by first trying to figure out how to control the crazy hair situation. So. THIS will be the only picture of me you see of the trip. I obviously haven’t mastered it yet.

We went into Cody and based ourselves out of there for a few days while we made day trips to Montana (over Beartooth Pass) and into Yellowstone  – went the wrong way in horrible rain and froze for the better part of 4 hours while I felt rain drip into the hole in my jeans and then froze on my legs and into my boots – The best part was Ry on the side of the road yelling at nothing in particular, “NOW we’re having fun! Yes! Now we’re HAVING fun!” (Loved him just a little bit more just then.)

 

And we tried on silly pink glitter cowgirl hats and drank beer for breakfast and listened to lots of good music and stayed in the best hotel with the most amazing shower and got sunburned and I ate nachos for 7 meals straight and laughed and talked and sat in silence and he saw a wolf and we both saw moose and smelled the rain and the flowers and saw the sparkle of the water and stood in places not many have ever stood and we were everything we wanted to be.

And then, of course, you must return to reality.

And the kids and I attended my father’s funeral.

(More on that when I’m ready to tell you some things. Now is not the time.)

And we are spreading Wayne’s ashes this weekend.

(More later.)

And … you know. Life has a way of making you figure it out. And so I am. Slowly.

Have you heard the song, Nemesis by David Gray? I am slow to get on his band wagon, but he is incredible. The song is about how there is a great equalizer in all things.

Makes me think of the man who gave me up for adoption but also sat on the other side of the playground fence to watch me play during elementary school recess – just to see how I moved through life.

Listen if you get a chance.

…

And this week I am moving out of my house and I am at the point of not wanting to move one more thing, so watch for a post tomorrow with lots of things for sale like:

Pottery Barn Kids White Changing Table

Ethan Allen Cherry Wood Armoire

Kenmore Upright Deep Freeze

Craftsman Standing Tool Chest

Pottery Barn Kids Honey Table with 4 chairs (red, green, blue, honey).

Pottery Barn Honey Desk (Adult size)

Pottery Barn Honey Filing Cabinet

Williams Sonoma Hammered Hanging Pot Rack

Xbox

2 children that won’t quit fighting.

 

Or text me at 913.530.2023 for first dibs.

Stay tuned.