Jan 22 2012

{ she said yes }

I have been guarding someone(s) and something very close to my heart and I wasn’t sure how to ever share it here. If the time was right. If it would ever be right.

But I don’t want to blog unless I can be honest and so I find myself telling you all some very good news.

I’m in love.

And apparently he loves me too, because he asked me to marry him last weekend.

And I said yes.

I said yes because I feel more like myself when I am with him than without him.

Because Claire and Caeden can’t wait to see him and if we somehow miss a day, it blows theirs.

I said yes because I love him so much that when I try to articulate it, all that ends up happening is I get a huge lump in my throat and my eyes well up.

Because I want a new word besides ‘love’ because I don’t think it does THIS justice.

I said yes because I feel safe and protected when he holds me.

(And he smells really good.)

Because his eyes are gentle and his smile melts me each and every time he flashes it my way.

And because he sings when he’s with me and he dances around the kitchen and he isn’t afraid to be silly.

Calls me his “bride” to get a reaction out of me.

All of which make me laugh, roll my eyes, and create such a sense of JOY in my heart. Of contentment and peace.

I said yes because I love the man he is. Kind and generous and thoughtful with his words, with his time, with his life.

Because he has a way of talking and emailing in a super polite way that cracks me up. Super formal …and he doesn’t try to be. Which makes him adorable. Extremely adorable.

I said yes because he is an amazing father to his little girl. And I see how much love he has to give. And I know how much we have to give in return.

How he talks about those who have entered his life and stayed; how gentle he is when he talks about those who have not.

He has integrity.

And I said yes because I cannot imagine spending one single day without him.

I love him for the butterflies I get when he looks at me. For the way he holds me, talks to me, for the way he makes me his priority.

Yes.

Yes because it’s possible to breathe and LOVE and plan and play and be silly and laugh and explore again.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

…

(The other voices are nothing but supportive and amazingly happy for us, but I just have to say, I’m glad I took nothing into account except the voice that talks to him.)

Lots More Soon.

XOXO.

Posted in New Beginnings

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Kellie - January 23, 2012 - 8:19 am

YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! I am soooo happy for you my friend. I am glad you said, “Yes”. He is a lucky man. <3

RC - January 23, 2012 - 8:22 am

I’ve been following your story for a long time. I am thrilled that you found love again. Wonderful.

Sara - January 23, 2012 - 9:00 am

Run with it!! Congrats!

Bethany - January 23, 2012 - 9:25 am

I too have been following your journey. I am truly happy for you and yours and wish you all nothing but the absolute best. <3

Jenny - January 23, 2012 - 9:27 am

I started following you last Christmas. I could not be happier for you!!!!!! B

Michelle - January 23, 2012 - 9:41 am

I am so happy for you and the direction your family is taking. This is good, this is great and so healthy. Love with all your heart, love unconditionally and don’t ever stop. It fill us up and gives us strength. It makes us the wonderful women we are today.

Please keep me posted!

Stacy - January 23, 2012 - 9:42 am

I don’t think I have ever commented, but I have been a long time reader and wanted to de-lurk to say Congrats! I am incredibly happy for you and your family.

Kasia - January 23, 2012 - 10:10 am

so very happy for you! i am too emerging from my hiding space. love your blog.

Sarah P. - January 23, 2012 - 10:19 am

I’ve been reading your blog for about one year, and I know this sounds crazy, but somehow I knew that you had found someone I think I realized it about a month ago (might have been longer ago: life is nuts, I tend to lose track of time). Don’t know how…there was just something that changed in your posts. Congratulations!

CPuhl - January 23, 2012 - 10:19 am

Congratulations Val! I wish you and your family nothing but amazing days ahead…even the everyday kind of days, I hope they’re wonderful. Although we haven’t met, I found you through Denise and MJC and have followed since the balloons. You’re an inspiration for the rest of us last minute Valentine shoppers out there. Enjoy every minute, you deserve it.

Susanna - January 23, 2012 - 10:31 am

Congratulations! Love is an amazing thing and I am so glad to hear that you have found it again! You and your kiddos desearve all the happiness in the world! Best wishes!! xoxo

Donna A - January 23, 2012 - 10:44 am

Amazing news! Congratulations and best wishes to you all.

Susan Martin - January 23, 2012 - 11:25 am

I have been following your blog for quite a while now and I am super happy to read this! It made me tear up to see that you are happy and your kids are happy!!! Glad that your life is continuing on this journey!!!

Carrie - January 23, 2012 - 11:29 am

Congratulations. I, too have been reading your blog for over a year-first found it through MJC. I love your photos and blogging style. Please don’t stop! I am so glad you have found love and happiness. Keep us posted!

angela - January 23, 2012 - 12:04 pm

Good for you! This warms my heart!

Jen - January 23, 2012 - 12:06 pm

Congrats!! Been following you for a little while and this is wonderful!! Wishing you many years of love, joy, and laughter! So happy for you and your family!

stefanie - January 23, 2012 - 1:10 pm

You don’t know me . . . and I only know you through these glimpses of your life on your blog. But I think of you often, have cried for you often, have hoped for you often and am inspired by you even more often. My heart is so happy for you and you deserve every. happy. beautiful. thing.
Congrats

Amy F - January 23, 2012 - 1:23 pm

Val… my sweet Val… I am overjoyed after reading your words, and am so happy you have found love. Please continue to share your new adventures!

Tammi - January 23, 2012 - 1:23 pm

Many congrats!! So glad that you are happy and the chickens are happy. Congrats!!

Shelby - January 23, 2012 - 1:28 pm

Stefanie said it perfectly. Val, I am so happy for you! Yes!!!

Darcy Jerome - January 23, 2012 - 1:30 pm

so happy for you!! . . . and i, too, think stefanie said it best!

Darcy Jerome - January 23, 2012 - 1:30 pm

i think this calls for some noosa!!

Kris @ At The Beach With Kris - January 23, 2012 - 1:40 pm

Congratulations – you deserve it all!!!

Laura - January 23, 2012 - 1:47 pm

you made me choke up and cry at the office. oh, honey, so very happy for you. and for those kiddos. All of them. yay!!!

Sara - January 23, 2012 - 1:56 pm

Oh happy day! So happy for all of you!

kelly - January 23, 2012 - 2:28 pm

Congratulations beautiful!!!! You deserve it! Praying God’s richest blessings on you and your loved ones:) WooHoo

Erica - January 23, 2012 - 2:56 pm

Yay! I cried! I am so happy for you! SO EXCITING!!!!!!

Jessica - January 23, 2012 - 3:09 pm

I read it twice just to be sure!!! I’m so happy for you. Thanks for sharing, I’ve been praying for this for you!

denise - January 23, 2012 - 3:29 pm

**sigh**

Jeff Peo - January 23, 2012 - 3:31 pm

So excited for you!

CarrieP - January 23, 2012 - 3:35 pm

Oh, the joy that is teeming from this post! Congratulations!

Brian - January 23, 2012 - 3:42 pm

Congrats to you!!

hels - January 23, 2012 - 4:00 pm

Yay!!!! Congratulations. We are SO happy for you all. xoxoxo

delise - January 23, 2012 - 4:17 pm

Oh Val! We are so happy for you, congratulations!!! We wish you all the happiness and joy that life has to offer!! Lucky him!!

Heather - January 23, 2012 - 4:27 pm

Love… so wonderful and powerful. I’m so happy for you and your kiddos.

Heather - January 23, 2012 - 4:27 pm

Love…%20so%20wonderful%20and%20powerful.%20%20I’m%20so%20happy%20for%20you%20and%20your%20kiddos.%20%20

Susan Sutherlin - January 23, 2012 - 4:46 pm

So happy for you and the kids. Congrats!

whitney - January 23, 2012 - 5:10 pm

OH MY GOODNESS. I am crying and happy and thrilled for you, friend!! When i saw the post this morning, it was password protected, and i thought about emailing you a nasty note to say how mean it was to put it out there but not let us read it. i love you and am so incredibly happy for you. can’t wait to hear more about this man. and i need some pics, because i bet he’s really cute.

Kacie - January 23, 2012 - 5:23 pm

YES, YES, YES!!! JUST SAYIN…YES! XOXO

Julie - January 23, 2012 - 6:11 pm

..i’ve been following your blog for over a year…your writing captivates me…you are such a talented writer, loving mother…and so much more…I’m so, so, so happy for you and the kids…you’ve found love again…he’s a lucky guy to have found you…wishing you all the very best…<3

chantelle - January 23, 2012 - 6:14 pm

So happy for you!

Amber - January 23, 2012 - 7:14 pm

Fantastic! I am very very happy for you, I am happy that you are able to see, that thru everything that has happened, you are still here on Earth and you still have A LOT of living to do! Oddly enough, I knew that you would be “off the market” before you ever even when back on it! LOL…you are amazing, So talented, gorgeous, AND you come with 2 of the cutesttttt little bonuses EVER!! Be happy for you and your precious family because, as you can see, all of us “lurkers” are happy for YOU! Lots of love! You inspire me!

Leslie - January 23, 2012 - 7:16 pm

I’m so happy for you and your family!! I’ve been following your story since last February and I’ve been waiting to read about this. I knew it would happen! You are way too pretty, smart, and kind for it not to. I wish you all the best…you derserve nothing but the BEST! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

April Hodges - January 23, 2012 - 7:20 pm

Sooooo happy for you!!!

pam - January 23, 2012 - 7:29 pm

I am so happy for all of you! You so deserve this.
Congratulations. Can’t wait to meet him.

Ashley P - January 23, 2012 - 7:55 pm

it’s amazing how God brings individuals at the right time….usually when we aren’t looking. congratulations Valerie!

Annalise - January 23, 2012 - 8:00 pm

Congratulations!!!!

Alaina Mayes - January 23, 2012 - 9:08 pm

Can’t help but smile as I read this. I’m so thankful that you were able to find someone who makes your heart beat, as well as the heart of your children. It is definitely a blessing to get a second go round as amazing as this one sounds. I can’t imagine how scary all of the “firsts” were, how scary it was realizing you had such feelings for someone else. But there’s nothing like treading new ground with such love and support next to you to make the scary/wonderful become reality.

I’m happy for you!! Congratulations!

isabel - January 24, 2012 - 2:01 am

Follow your heart !!!
So happy for you…

Julie Roberts - January 24, 2012 - 6:21 am

Love this post and the news it brings….you and your little ones deserve this!

Sharon L - January 24, 2012 - 6:34 am

I have been praying for you to find peace and happiness to heal your life and make you whole again. Congratulations to all!

Kellie - January 24, 2012 - 7:14 am

i don’t even know you and i’m smiling… so happy for you. many blessings on you both (and all the chickens!)

Kris - January 24, 2012 - 7:19 am

Congrats! You deserve nothing but the best in life. You and your little chickens!

Kari - January 24, 2012 - 8:22 am

life can be so hard but also so amazing. i am sure it was hard to put this on a public board for all of us to judge you. your posts became happier awhile back and it was awesome to read. i am glad you are happy, for whatever reason, because you and your kids deserve it. congrats and i hope we see some pics and more updates soon. <3

Marci - January 24, 2012 - 9:52 am

seriously GOOSEBUMPS!!!! just came like crazy! and as I read each sentence it was like I could hear the happiness in your heart!
Congrats!!

Kim - January 24, 2012 - 10:01 am

Oh, happiness! Your words exude happiness, and I could not be happier for you. So deserved. So welcomed. So sweet & giddy. Joy to you and your love and your *new* family. Yes, yes, yes!!

Alysa - January 24, 2012 - 10:10 am

Moved beyond words. Simply beautiful. Thank you for letting us in on your world, your journey, your family, your business, you. You inspire.

Shelley - January 24, 2012 - 10:32 am

It’s somewhat amazing that I could feel this level of happiness for a complete stranger! I have been following your blog for months now — have cried for you, laughed with you, and, perhaps most importantly, felt compelled to pray for you and your children on many, many occassions. Congratulations – I am so happy for this next chapter in your life and look forward to reading all about it! Thank you for being willing to share your life with all of us — you are an inspiration and an amazing example of God’s grace.

erica - January 24, 2012 - 10:44 am

Congrats Val, so very happy for you xoxo

carrie - January 24, 2012 - 10:50 am

That is awesome – I am so happy for you and your family. You guys deserve nothing but the best! I don’t normally comment, but I was just too glad for you to hold it in. Wishing you all of the best and congratulations to you for following your heart!

Lita - January 24, 2012 - 12:07 pm

Yay!

And step it up with the details, will ya?

Stephanie O'Connor - January 24, 2012 - 12:59 pm

I am tearing up with overwhelming joy! Congrats!

hikinglisa - January 24, 2012 - 1:26 pm

I found you via Denise/mJ and have been following your journey ever since. Don’t think i’ve ever commented, so now is the time! So happy for you and your special man!

kelly collins - January 24, 2012 - 2:22 pm

Love.love.love…that you found love or it found you!
Love.always!

Richard - January 24, 2012 - 7:08 pm

I’m not sure how I found your blog, but I’ve been following you for about a year. I’ve shed many a tear as I read blog. You have such a beautiful way with words and photos. I had my wife read this post, she’s been following you also, and her reaction was exactly the same as mine….a very big long lasting smile!! We are both very very happy for you! Please please continue to share your new beginnings!!!

Nathalie - January 24, 2012 - 7:55 pm

Well, you know how I feel! I am head of heels wth happiness for you! congratulations! Glad to see the book was used for such a perfect occasion!!

I.Maia - January 25, 2012 - 4:22 am

This is just so beautiful!!!!… I wish you ALL the best!

Kari - January 25, 2012 - 5:53 am

Wonderful…congrats!

kristen - January 25, 2012 - 6:42 am

I got a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes reading that!! I’m so excited for you and your kids and your husband and daughter to be. Love is amazing and so if life!! My heart is bursting for your happiness. A million congratulations. Can’t wait to hear more.
A blog lurker in NC
Kristen

Misty Little - January 25, 2012 - 8:18 am

Awesome for you and your kids Val!!! We all are cheering you on from the sidelines as you all deserve to be happy again!!! Congratulations to you!!! So neat!

karen - January 25, 2012 - 9:02 am

Really? Am I the only out there who will be honest enough to say Really? I am shocked, your husband just died and you are getting married again? What’s wrong with you?

Mirys Segalla - January 25, 2012 - 10:05 am

Oh my God!
I´m SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy for you! (a little bit jeaulous, but mostly happy! LoL)

Kisses and blessings. Lots of both!!!
Love you “sis”.
Mirys

Daron - January 25, 2012 - 10:17 am

Karen- Yes, you are the only one who has the audacity to say that. Shame on you. Until you have walked ONE step in Val’s shoes, you really cannot judge.

Val – CONGRATS, you and your chickens deserve all the love in this world!

April - January 25, 2012 - 11:58 am

Congratulations!!! You and your children deserve this happiness.

Karen: First its been almost a year you make it sound like it was yesterday…. Next my best friend died in May of Cancer at the age of 34. Her husband of 16 years and her 3 girls, ages 13, 8, and 2 all deserve the happiness of a complete family. I know it will be hard to see another woman in her place but I know with all my heart that is what she would have wanted. And I didn’t know Wayne but I’m sure that is what he wants for Val and his children also. Don’t judge someone until you have walked in there shoes!!!

Rylan - January 25, 2012 - 12:31 pm

Why is it that miserable people can not understand why other people can be so happy? Val’s grieving began the day she was told that her husband had stage four cancer. The loss of her husband was a slow painful process over the course of roughly three years. Wayne has been gone for almost a year. She knows loss. She knows saddness. Do not judge her because she chooses to leave loss and saddness behind.

Val is able to see life through a lense that most of us wish to look through. This is one of the many reasons that I love her and have asked her to be my wife.

Kayla - January 25, 2012 - 1:05 pm

We are all very excited to welcome you to our family. I understand your aunt is actually a high school buddy of mine. I am so happy for you and that good looking guy!

Allison H. - January 25, 2012 - 1:52 pm

I say “YAY VAL” for having the COURAGE to say yes to love for a second time when so few are willing to say yes to it even once!

I say “YAY VAL” for giving HOPE to those who have lost loved ones by showing them they can find love and happiness again!

I say “YAY VAL” for having the STRENGTH to keep living life fully for you and your kiddos!

I say “YAY VAL” for not just letting love in, but letting it win too, when most would close that door forever to avoid the possiblity of pain again!

I say “YAY VAL, RYLAN, CAEDEN, CLAIRE, & GRACE” for the love and happiness you will find together as a family!

For those of you who have never loss a loved one to terminal illness, the grieving process begins long before the person is physically gone. It is wrong to judge one’s jouney through something like this even if you have loss someone yourself. No two journeys are ever the same. There is no calender or set of procedures one needs to follow. I think it is most important in situations like these to celebrate the love, the happiness, and the triumphs that transcend the grief and loss!! Love you Val and we are so excited for you all!!

Jamie - January 25, 2012 - 3:02 pm

Congrats to you and Rylan!!! You deserve to be happy and to lead the best life!!!! He is an amazing person as are you, therefore there is to be nothing but happiness between you both and the children!!!!! Bitter people who wish no happiness onto others are truly selfish within their own world. Again, CONGRATS!!!!!!!

Jennie Loehding - January 25, 2012 - 5:30 pm

Congrats – Val and Rylan!!

Kim - January 25, 2012 - 9:44 pm

It breaks my heart that someone has the audacity to say anything negative about this awesome news. Please don’t let one rude comment discourage you Val! You deserve this happiness!! I have been reading your blog for quite some time now and am so thrilled for you! I hope you will continue to update us and I am looking forward to engagement and wedding pictures! Congratulations to you both!! hugs! =)

Kim Ferrel - January 25, 2012 - 9:53 pm

It breaks my heart that someone has the audacity to say anything negative about this. You deserve all the happiness in the world Val and I’m so glad you have found someone to share your life with again. I have been reading your blog for quite a while now and I hope you don’t let this negative comment discourage you from sharing here. You have taught me so much about life and have shown such grace through utter heartbreak. I hope you continue to keep us updated and I am looking forward to engagment and wedding pictures! Congratulations to you both!!

Angela - January 25, 2012 - 10:39 pm

Congrats!!! I like many have just been a “lurker” until now. I started following just before Wayne’s death & have shed many tears & said many prayers for your family. Love is amazing & I’m so happy that you have been blessed to find it twice in one lifetime. Thank you for sharing this joy in your life!

Jesicca Kallas - January 25, 2012 - 11:20 pm

I held my breath when I read the title and as I read I felt my shoulders relax and I made a loud sigh. I am so happy that ‘through finding Val’, you have found love again. XOXO

Kate - January 26, 2012 - 1:52 am

Hooray for Love! Congratulations!

Heather - January 26, 2012 - 2:10 am

Congratulations!! I too am sitting here crying tears of joy for you, a stranger with such beauty and art and love who lives on the other side of the world. Whom I have never met and in all probablility will never have the luck to meet. Those silent tears turned into sobs when I read what Rylan wrote about you. Bless! May all your lives be full of joy! Congratulations again!!

lindsey - January 26, 2012 - 5:33 am

CONGRATS CONGRATS!!! I am so happy for you..I only know you thru your blog and could never be happier for someone you truly do deserve this!!! Please dont ever take what one negative person has to say bother you in anyway…until she has walked in your shoes she has NO clue……Im a daughter who lost her dad and my dad was my world and there is nothing else I would rather see than to see my mother find love again and be happy and I KNOW for a fact that my dad would want the same for her…just cause someone finds love again does NOT mean that they ever lose that love for the one they lost! No one will ever take Waynes place as your kids father but they deserve a father figure in there life as much as you deserve to find love again!!! Keep that smile on your face and that love in your heart…you touch so many peoples lives with every blog you post, you truly are an amazing person and someone that so many of us wish we could be more like….your positive and loving attitude radiates thru your blog! Congrats again to you and Rylan he sure is one lucky man!!!!

Tiffany - January 26, 2012 - 1:39 pm

Congratulations a million times over!!! You deserve happiness and comfort after the last few years. And isn’t it almost unreal to think you would not have met this man and be so in love had it not been for all that pain and sadness? I’m sure Wayne has something to do with this. My father-in-law recently passed away from cancer and his wife is far too young to have lost a spouse (she’s 58). I have always felt that if she finds love again, that man would be deliberately put in her path by him. And yea(!) for your children too! Life does go on…

Beth P - January 26, 2012 - 2:11 pm

There is no measure of time for grief, nor for finding love again. Val, you grieved so deeply for Wayne, yourself and your children that I sometimes found myself unable to read from my own tears. You found the strength to go on, and now have found love again. Such an honor to be on this journey with you. You inspire me to be a better woman, wife and mother with every post. Congratulations!

jocelyne - January 26, 2012 - 5:08 pm

just de-lurking to add my congrats!!!!!!!!!!

Rochelle - January 27, 2012 - 5:36 am

YES! Live everyday, Val. Enjoy this happiness.

Fran - January 27, 2012 - 8:51 am

I am very happy for you and your children. Wishing you the very best with your new husband.

Ash - January 27, 2012 - 9:59 am

I too am adding my complete congratulations!! SOOOO happy for you! It’s funny how things fall together when things fall apart. Life and love are good

Holly Haddad - January 27, 2012 - 11:11 am

Awesome – congratulations! best of luck!!

Elizabeth - January 27, 2012 - 12:13 pm

How wonderful. you. should. be. happy. and. in. love.

Deanna - January 27, 2012 - 6:10 pm

Congratulations!! May God bless you with happily ever after!

Cathy M. - January 28, 2012 - 9:59 am

so so so so so happy for you!!! and the kids!! so happy!! hugs, cathy

Jeremy Polk - January 28, 2012 - 5:56 pm

absolutly awesome!!!!!

Sonja Sheffer - January 28, 2012 - 9:07 pm

So happy for you!! I know you don’t know me, but I’ve enjoyed your blog for many months. I hope you won’t mind me jumping for joy in your behalf as it is the best exercise I’ve had all week.

Claudia - January 29, 2012 - 7:04 pm

I too have been following your journey, tears and laughers, I look forward to your posts. I’m so so happy for you Val, live life and love to the fullest – always!
I wish you all the best and please don’t stop writing, either here or somewhere, you truly have a gift!

Karen, if that’s your name, what a sad woman you are for thinking that and how dare you write it down? Crawl back behind your computer and back to your miserable life.

Sarah - January 30, 2012 - 12:29 pm

Congratulations to you and your family! People will judge, who cares. Be happy, you deserve it!

Julie - January 30, 2012 - 6:57 pm

I have been a follower of your blog for a long time…a silent follower…never a commentor…until now. : ) Pretty sure Wayne and the Father above sent the gift and love of Rylan to you and your children. Thank you for always opening your heart to your readers….best wishes to you as you start this new chapter of your life!

Meg - January 30, 2012 - 7:57 pm

I am so completely happy for you and your family. I cannot wait to follow your wedding planning and happliy ever after through your blog, photos and Pinterest!

Rachael - February 3, 2012 - 4:34 pm

So wonderfully happy for you and your chickens :0)

Cindy - February 28, 2012 - 8:45 pm

Congrats, Val and Rylan-you are both kind hearted and wonderful people. You have endured so much and its time its payed forward to you! Many more Blessings to you all!

Anitra Laird - February 29, 2012 - 12:58 pm

I have also been a long time follower…My heart leapt for joy for you!!! YAY! What great, happy news!! Congrats!

In the Moment | Valerie Koop

{ she said yes }