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Wayne is in the hospital.

Feeling like he needed to go to the hospital for a week but never said a word. Only that he looked forward to seeing his Oncologist (the one here in Denver) on Friday (which, is now today).

Yesterday.

He walked into the kitchen and found me crying.

So much for doing that in the shower.

And he didn’t say anything. He walked away. Pretending.

And then minutes later, back into the kitchen, he said, “Do you want me to go to the hospital?”

Yes.

Fast forward a few hours.

Fluid collecting around his right lung. INR level WAY high.

No wonder he couldn’t breathe/wasn’t feeling good.

They admitted him and told him they would drain the fluid today (Friday) once they pumped him full of Vitamin K to bring his INR level back to normal.

(Draining fluid – have him lay on his back and insert needle into lungs and drain fluid out with syringe.)

Today is Caeden’s Halloween party.

Feeling sorry for Wayne (and myself) that he won’t be able to be in Caeden’s class to see the parade of costumes.

I remember last Halloween Wayne was so sick from chemo he couldn’t even hand candy out for tricker treaters. I just sat the bowl of candy out on the porch as Caeden and I trick or treated together.

So much he is missing. And when he looks at the kids, I can tell he is thinking about it, too.

But he NEVER complains.

Yesterday we both listened the nurse dictate Wayne’s chart.

“He is such a nice man. Patiently waiting for a room (5 hours and counting in the ER. We were not patient …).

Has been in for open heart surgery, surgery for blood clot, toxicity …

And she rattled off his history, I listened to the LONG list.

The evidence that this hospital has seen of Wayne’s battle.

Thinking there is another hospital in Houston with a list of it’s own.

I glanced over at Wayne.

Wearing a hospital gown, hooked up to medicine and oxygen, and watched him listening, too.

He looks thin.

His hair is growing back.

He was tired.

He was relieved that he was there but wishing he was home in his own bed.

He is 38 years old.

These are descriptions that SHOULD NOT BELONG to him.

SHOULD NOT.